Rob Ford Said Pussy on Television. It Was Bad.

If you’re the mayor of a city – whether it’s small or the largest city in Canada – and you plan on saying something so crude and vulgar that journalists have to mentally debate whether or not it’s appropriate for them to put it in their broadcast or publish it online, then you shouldn’t say that thing.

But that has never stopped Rob Ford, not in the past and certainly on Thursday. It doesn’t stop the man who’s had to make several apologies for several separate incidents in the past week, and who had to make another couple this afternoon in Toronto, after he made the following comments to a scrum of reporters:

“It said I wanted to eat her pussy,” the Mayor said, addressing – rather, igniting – reports released yesterday alleging he had made that verbal sexual advance on a female staffer.

“I’ve never said that in my life to her. I would never do that. I’m happily married. I’ve got more than enough to eat at home.”

Seriously, I was left saying “Dot Dot Dot”.

If you’re on Ford’s team, you’re wondering how fast you can get the curtain down. If you were in his presence when he made those remarks, you were laughing, as you can see at the end of the video above.

The problem with Ford’s continued and repeated excuses and apologies for everything that happens with each and every day – and he did apologize later on Thursday for the morning’s remarks, saying he is seeking help from health care professionals with his wife by his side – is that he’s routinely asking for Toronto’s forgiveness as an individual, not as the Mayor of their city.

Sure, we know people have problems. They may struggle through alcoholism or drug addiction, or even just drug abuse. They may curse like a sailor and they may be unprofessional. They may drag down the name of their hometown sports franchises, forcing the Argos to distance themselves from him just for the fact he was wearing one of their jerseys during this morning’s R-rated public address.

But mayors don’t have these problems. Rather, mayors can’t have these problems.

We need mayors to be representatives of our cities, especially in Toronto. It’s Canada’s only metropolis, and even then just a little.

Politicians need to be public. They need to be trustworthy. Is it always fair they get half a chance to impress us? Maybe not, but that’s part of the game. There’s a reason Jon Stewart’s not running for President – he doesn’t want to insult himself.

I’ll give Rob Ford some credit, because he’s quickly slashed through his nine lives and he’s somehow still meowing. I’m not sure how you even do that – how you turn a democratic office into a regime, or how you transform city hall into a bunker.

But the jig is up. It’s getting old. There’s nothing left for him to do but step down, wipe his hands, and glide off into whatever his version of a sunset is with as much O’Doul’s as possible.

That won’t just be good for Toronto. It would be good for him, too.