Mexico: Passionate, Soap Opera-Esque Turmoil and Talent (World Cup 2014)

Mexico - World Cup


World Ranking: 20


When have you last heard anything good about Mexico?

Does your family still want to vacation there? If you’re a kid, like 12 to 15 years old, will your parents even let you leave the resort?

A country so startlingly beautiful has been torn apart by drugs and the war surrounding them – Mexico is what we think Colombia is, and Colombia is what we think Mexico was.

This has little to do with football, but it is leading me somewhere… basically, Mexico is the most forgotten footballing nation in the ‘Central’ American world, probably because it’s kind of a part of the North American world. When we think of the South American countries destined to thrive under their own sun in Brazil, we think of Argentina and Uruguay and Colombia and Chile… but why won’t we think of Mexico?

They’re good enough to advance, at least they were in South Africa. They were good enough at the Olympics two years ago, and against decent competition. How much has changed? (A lot, actually.) Do we really know?

Has Anthony Bourdain Been Here?

Many times.

Mouth-Watering Recipe:

Real Salsa.

Crystal Ball:

They’ll advance, in second place. That would give them a first-round matchup with Spain, a uni-lingual battle that could provide this World Cup with its first and most memorable upset. Of course, there’s a good chance the Mexican’s dysfunctional lead-up to Rio could cause them to go all France on each other, which would give Spain a free pass against Croatia or Cameroon instead.

A (Shallow) Question:

Who thought these trashy jerseys were a good idea? Can’t you already picture those rags in some Training Day-esque movie to be released in 2023? They look like the fake jerseys your aunts and uncles buy you from Target. They’re the kinds of shirts that are always a size too big, no matter how small you buy them.

*Also, how in pain does head coach Miguel Herrera look in this selfie?


  • vs Cameroon: Friday, June 13 (9:00 a.m. PST)
  • vs Brazil: Tuesday, June 17 (12:00 p.m. PST)
  • vs Croatia: Monday, June 23 (1:00 p.m. PST)