How Much Trouble Are the Los Angeles Dodgers In?

Zach Greinke and Magic Johnson - LA Dodgers
(Photo “courtesy” of


by Tom Ebbetts

Diamond Dispatch, White Cover Magazine


How much trouble are the Los Angeles Dodgers in?

In short, not much. If they want to win a World Series, though, then, yeah… they’ll need some work. Some tweaking. Some help with the plumbing downstairs. Maybe a condom to fit their $2 billion value into the NLCS and beyond.

“It took a fortune to assemble the 2013 Los Angeles Dodgers, and it may take many more millions to turn them into a championship-caliber team,” wrote Grantland‘s Rany Jazayerli on Wednesday. “We’re living through another gilded age right now, where the fabulously wealthy become ridiculously wealthy while the rest putter along. The stock market keeps rocketing up while unemployment refuses to go down. Hedge-fund managers pay lower tax rates than their secretaries. A Paul Cézanne painting gets sold for more than a quarter-billion dollars.”

The Dodgers are now so rich — in theory and in the boardroom — that they don’t even have to worry about what the word trouble means. They’re in that same group as the Toronto Maple Leafs, Manchester United, the Dallas Cowboys, and the Yankees. They’re just big, man, and losing ain’t gonna change that. They don’t have to worry about petty things like social media trends or the playoffs. They won’t cost them money, and the fans will still be coming back, because this is baseball, damnit.

These are the Dodgers, and this is Matt Kemp:


harperbomb - The Score GIF

Bryce Harper now has four home runs. The season, like, just started. Harper was outshadowed last season by the incredible debut — and then, an MVP-worthy (without the actual MVP trophy) remainder of the season — of Anaheim’s Mike Trout.

(*That picture just above is from The Score. They also asked the question, “If you could only choose one MLB player to build a franchise around, who would it be?)

Harper’s value, however, shouldn’t be metered in the length or the quantity of his home runs.

If the Washington Nationals can actually challenge for a World Series in 2013, that’s all that matters.

Bryce Harper Washington Post PHOTO
(Photo “courtesy” of


Bud Selig and Major League Baseball have installed a “diversity task force”. The aim is to figure out why not so many black people play baseball anymore.

I assume this will be like when you’re on the phone with someone and say, “Hold on, I’ll check my schedule” and then you just wait 15 seconds and reply with, “Actually, no, I can’t make it.”

From Yahoo! Sports:

Tyler Kepner of the New York Times writes that 8.5 percent of the players on 25-man opening-day rosters were blacks from the U.S., down from a high of 19 percent in 1986, citing statistics published by Mark Armour of the Society of American Baseball Research. Numbers like those, along with the coming this week of “42,” a movie biography of Jackie Robinson, leave Selig shrugging:

“I really think our history is so brilliant when it comes to African-Americans,” Selig said. “You think about the late 1940s, the 1950s — wow. And you look at that and you say to yourself, Why did it not continue, and what could we do to make sure it does continue?

“Reading between the lines of his quotes, Selig doesn’t seem convinced that MLB necessarily has a problem, per se. But he wants to at least appear earnest in finding out for sure.”

Okay, now… imagine Bud Selig reads those stats above, then watched this trailer for the new movie 42, and then makes the face below.

It’s funny.