NHL Playoff Preview: (2) Boston Bruins v. (7) Washington Capitals

*What better way to decide a series than by a sequence of unrelated questions? (NOTE: Nobody at White Cover has ever seen Twilight.)

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Are the Bruins really a No. 2?

No. They should be considered a Stanley Cup favourite (like, duh!), but the Bruins finished tied for fourth in points in the East.

Are the Capitals really a No. 7?

Honestly, who the Hell really knows? You’d think that, with Nicklas Backstrom back, this team would leapfrog others ahead of them, or at least beat out Florida for third. Then again, if they were really that good, they would be that good. They haven’t shown us anything yet.

The Kennedys, or “The Kennedys”?

Beacon Hill and the Irish Catholics go up against the town that JFK famously ripped with this line: “Washington is a city of Southern efficiency and Northern charm.” Clovers go up against Cherry Blossoms. Watergate goes up against Jeremy Renner from The Town. We’ll give Boston the win here.

Which columnist(s) should you avoid reading during this matchup?

Dan Shaughnessy. He’s a slug.

Who should you cheer for if you’re on Team Edward?

The Bruins. Defending champs look to re-capture their crown in the sequel.

Who should you cheer for if you’re on Team Jacob?

The Caps. Oddly enough, this team is somehow a lovable underdog. Until Alex Semin does something, of course.

What nickname will stick from this series?

#BackstromVision. It really should be a button in NHL 13.

Who are the best players in this series?

1) Alex Ovechkin, Washington.
2) Nicklas Backstrom, Washington.
3) Tim Thomas, Boston.

Who is the player to watch in this series?

Nicklas Backstrom. Sssssshhhhhhhh! Don’t say anything, but this is the guy who actually makes the Capitals go. Ssssssshhhhhhhhhh!!!

Who’s the goat, right now?

Alex Semin, Washington.

Who’s the hero, right now?

Patrice Bergeron, Boston.

Who’s the goat, at the end?

Alex Semin, Washington.

Who’s the hero, at the end?

Patrice Bergeron, Boston.

Who will receive the most love from Biz Nasty 2.0 during this series?

Tim Thomas. Both these guys love social media. It’s just that one of them puts him self out there intentionally with full knowledge that people will read what he’s saying. The other puts it out there, but it’s your problem.

If this series were a character from Snatch, who would it be?

Boris the Blade. You can’t kill me. You can’t kill me. You can’t kill me.

Which team has the best swag?

Washington, but it’s wearing thin.

Which team has the best swagger?

Boston. The defending Cup champs view everybody else as arrogant, which means they probably are, too.

Who will Bruins fans know a lot better by the time this thing is over?

Braden Holtby.

Who will Caps fans know a lot better by the time this thing is over?


Andrew Ference.

Prediction?

Bruins in six, but no shocker is this thing goes the distance. And, by the distance, we mean Game 7 overtime. What WHAT!